It's the End of the World as we Know it
by AshNPadfoot
Summary: How could the world come crashing down on Ashleigh? First her Boyfriend breaks up with her and then her being a Daddy's girl, she loses her father to the war. What more could happen?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own any Harry Potter Characters, they belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own my plot and original characters.

I picked up my books from my desk in class. It was the end of my sixth year at Hogwarts. A boarding school for witches and wizards. I had just finished my last class of the day, Potions. Although Potions was easy for me it was my least favorite class because of all the Slytherins. I hated the Slytherins just like any other Gryffindor does. I was placing my last book in my bag when I felt the familiar arms of my boyfriend wrap around me.

"Hey Gorgeous." Sirius whispered in my ear. I got chills up my back when he whispered my name. He was such a good boyfriend. I mean yeah he had tons of girls after him but he had picked me out of all of them and we have been going out for about 2 months. Sirius was gorgeous himself; he had jet-black hair that hung around his face and sometimes fell into his deep blue eyes. But I barely got to look into his eyes. It seemed as if every time I tried he would joke or look away or try to kiss me. I knew that Sirius was the type of guy who just shagged and then moved on but part of me wanted to think it was different. I mean I was Sirius' longest relationship so far, I don't think that he has been someone as long as I have been with him so far.

"Hi." I said smiling and giving him a peck on the lips when I was sure no one was looking. He grabbed my hand and we started to walk away from that horrible class. I was glad that I wouldn't have to see the Professor for at least 3 months because we were leaving for our summer holiday tomorrow.

"Hey Ash!" Adam, my favorite twin brother in the entire world said coming closer to Sirius and I.

"Hey Bro." I said letting go of Sirius' hand immediately. I wasn't like every other girl that Sirius used to date; I didn't like to show affection in public. I would have been content just kissing him in private. That was what was so different between Sirius and I; he wanted to show off who he was dating while I wanted to keep between the two of us. I gave Adam a hug and we stood there for a few awkward moments.

"Well, I'll let you two love birds be alone but I need to talk to you later. Its about dad, he wants to meet us tonight in his office." Adam said before heading off. I should tell you that my dad works here at the school. He has been the DADA teacher since before I came here. It is a little weird to have my dad working here but I love it because Adam and I are so close to our dad. Don't get me wrong, we have a mom but she never really seemed to take an interest in us. My dad always took care of us while our mom was out working as an Auror for the Ministry.

"Ash, we need to…" Sirius started before we were interrupted by his cousin Bellatrix and his brother Regulus.

"Sirius, you could do so much better, I mean a TEACHERS daughter?" Bella had said. I looked away quickly because I wasn't and haven't been one for confrontation. I tried to shut my ears so I couldn't hear what was being said. All I ended up hearing was Sirius saying something and then they left. I looked at Sirius who looked pissed off. But when I caught him off guard and looked deep into his eyes I sad nothing but sadness and loneliness. My heart immediately ached when I saw how sad he was. I gave him a hug and kiss him on the cheek.

"I'm sorry." I said giving him a hug.

"Its ok." He whispered back and we stood there in each other's arms for a while before he pulled back. He knew that I had just seen the real him, and even though I was glad that I saw that there was more to him rather than him joking around a lot and not having a care in the world.

"What were you going to say?" I asked him. He shook his head and then he escorted me to my dad's office. Adam was already lounging on the couch in my dad's office. My dad was a very jolly laid back kind of man. He was always making his students work hard but he did it in a way that made the students WANT to work. He had a charm and a charisma around him that made people want to be near him. He even passed that charm down to us. Both Adam and I had his charms and some of his looks. Him and my dad looked almost identical, Adam and I were looking at old pictures of him when he was a kid and they could have been pictures of Adam. I had the same bone structure in my face as them but my hair was longer than theirs. Adam and I had black hair and bright green eyes. Our father says its because his mum was Irish but we know she wasn't. We don't really care where our eyes had come from because we loved the way they looked. It was perfect against our dark hair and cheekbones. It just completed our look. We were both pretty thin, Adam was on the Gryffindor Quidditch team as the Keeper and I used to be a chaser until I got so overwhelmed by my schoolwork that I quit.

"Hi daddy." I said giving him a huge hug. He was wearing some muggle clothing and he relaxing in his over sized chair behind his desk. I sat on top of Adam and he made a sound before he pushed me onto the floor. I gave out a half cry half laugh before I got up and started to rub my butt.

"Stop it you two… I have something important that I have to tell the two of you." He said but then he was quiet. Adam and I glanced at each other he got up and let me sit next to him. When my dad said important he meant it. He meant everything he said so you knew to take him seriously.

"I have to do something before we leave Hogwarts, and I wont be able to escort you guys home from the station. I wont be back until next week." He said. Why? I thought. He was a teacher; it wasn't like he was doing the same job as mom.

"But…" I started.

"No. You guys are old enough to make the trip home without me. The Potters' have agreed to drive you home so you will be safe." He said. Adam opened his mouth to protest this time but dad just held up his hand to silence him. We both sank back against the back of the couch at the same time. A few minutes later our dad dismissed us and we left walking slowly to dinner.

"Where do you think…" I started.

"I don't know. Maybe he is going to do some research for his next book." Adam said shrugging it off.

"Liar." I said under my breath.

"Ash, I don't know just like you don't know so you can't call me a liar." Adam snapped. We were never usually like this, sure we had some sibling rivalry but that was only normal every now and then. But lately it has seemed as if we have had more fighting then normal. I knew that Adam hated that I was seeing Sirius but I really truly liked Sirius. Not because of his looks but just him. I loved the way he smiled and laughed when he thought something was funny. Even when he laughed just to break the tension. I loved that he had a troubled life and he was loyal to his friends. Sirius hasn't once tried to do anything more than kiss me since we started to go out and I loved that. He was being a gentleman and it made me feel special. He even respected that I didn't like to show affection in public, which made me like him even more. Some could argue that I was in love with him and in a sense I was. I loved everything about him but I wasn't ready to be in love with him. Not at all.

"I'm sorry. I just feel weird as if something horrible is going to happen you know." I said fully aware that he did know because he could feel the same thing as me. I remember when we were little I was be sitting on the floor in the playpen that my father had built for us because we were at the age where we got into everything in sight. Every time I would cry because I wanted something Adam was always the one who knew exactly what I wanted without me even saying anything. He would get up go to the toy chest and give me the exact thing that I wanted. My dad used to call it twin intuition, he said we always knew what each other wanted no matter the circumstances.

"I don't see why you like him, he's a complete git." Adam said out of nowhere but I knew whom he was talking about. It was the same fight over and over again for the last two months.

"Oh my god, not this again. Adam you really need to get over this. Sirius and I were together and that's it." I said hoping he would drop it.

"But you can do some much better. And what do you mean not again? I'm only looking out for you." Adam said.

"Are you a seer?" I asked him. He gave me a weird look until he knew where I was going g with this. Then he sighed and shook his head.

"That's right, no. So drop this, you don't know that this is going to turn out badly." I said as we reached the Great hall.

"I know because it's Sirius." He muttered as I sat in between Sirius and Adam. I was never the type who had many female friends. I was always hanging out with the guys because there were nothing but guys in our neighborhood growing up and it was just easier to be myself around them. When I came to school Adam and I were inseparable, he had been friends with a few guys from our year and we ended up hanging out with them. He was also friends with James and Remus, he never liked Sirius much because he was always after girls like they were pieces of meat.

"Everything ok?" Remus asked noticing the tension between us. I always loved Remus, he was my favorite out of all of Adam's friends. He was intelligent and sensible and I could talk to him about things other than Quidditch.

"Perfectly fine." I said cheering up and eating my dinner. I could put on my charm that I had gotten from my father at any time. I just chose not to do it in front of people I hated such as Bella and her friends and certain strangers.

"What are your plans for the summer?" James asked me. He was sitting across from Sirius and I. I felt Sirius tense up so I glanced at him but he was avoiding eye contact.

"Not sure yet, how about you?" I asked him. He shrugged and we all continued to eat.

"You know where we should go!" I said getting all excited because I loved to travel.

"Where?" Adam asked even though he had an idea in his head.

"We should go to the States, my pen pal was telling me about this muggle amusement park that they have there and they have these awesome thrill seeking rides called Roasting Coolers… or something like that and we could check that out. I bet we can convince dad to do that for our family vacation this summer." I said getting really excited just telling them about it. Sirius and Remus laughed.

"What?" I asked innocently. I touched my face to make sure I hadn't spilt anything on my face or anything.

"No, nothing like that." Sirius said realizing what I was worrying about. "We just think it's funny and cute how innocent you looked when you were talking." Sirius said interlocking his fingers in mine under the table. I knew that I was blushing because I could feel my face getting hot.

"Oh, I love vacations. I remember this one time we went to Egypt with dad… do you remember Adam? And we had so much fun in all the pyramids and everything. It was great." I said forgetting all about my uneasy feeling about something going horribly wrong.

"I love that you are so care free. Its refreshing." Sirius said out of nowhere. I smiled and looked away because I didn't know what to say to that. When I looked away I could see Remus giving Sirius a bad look along with James who had recently been trying to talk to Lily Evans who was on his other side. HE had been trying to get Lily ever since they met. He told me it was love at first sight and that he would do anything to be with her. So I told him to stop dating around and he had, all year he hasn't looked at one girl other than Lily Evans. I was one of her roommates and I knew that she had noticed. He was ecstatic when I first told him about her noticing.

"What's wrong?" I asked them. They both dropped their looks and replaced it with a happy look. They shook their heads no and then went back to their dinner. I knew something was up but I couldn't quite place it. I made a mental note to talk to Remus and Adam about it later before my thoughts were interrupted by Professor Dumbledore standing to make an End of the Year speech.

"Another year gone by that has been great and I am happy to announce that Gryffindor wins the House cup." Dumbledore said. We all erupted in applause happy that we had beaten the Slytherins for the sixth year in a row. Dumbledore said a few more words before telling us all to go to bed and be ready to leave tomorrow morning. Everyone filed out of the Great hall, Sirius and his friends were a few yards ahead of Adam and I.

"Did you notice that Dad wasn't at the table?" Adam asked when there weren't many people around.

"Yeah, I'm sure he'll tell us where he went when he comes home." I said trying to keep the conversation light. Adam nodded and we entered the common room to find everyone partying with music, butterbeer and tons of laughing. Right in the middle of the crowd was Sirius and James making everyone laugh. We joined the party taking a butterbeer and laughing our worries away. After a while Sirius got away from the crowd and joined me. We went to a corner in the common room and I sat on his lap.

"Having fun?" I asked him. He nodded and gave me a kiss on the lips. I always got the chills up and down my back when he touched me and kissed me.

"You're an amazing girl, I have never known someone like you." He said barely a whisper.

"What do you mean by that? How am I different?" I asked him. He thought for a second before replying.

"You are so innocent and you're sweet and you just… you captivate me." He said.

"Whoa, Sirius using big words. What's going on with you?" I asked jokingly. He gave a nervous laugh. I could tell that he liked me a lot because he was looking into my eyes and I felt as if he wanted me to see his bare soul. As if he was offering me a glimpse into his life and a chance to uncover his secrets.

"I love you." I said all of sudden without thinking. I was so mesmerized that he was showing me a bit of his soul that I didn't control what came out of my mouth. Sirius froze and opened his mouth and then closed it.

"I didn't mean it like that. I meant I love your kisses." I said with a genuine smile on my face forcing myself to act carefree again so he wouldn't see through me. He sighed a relieved sigh and kissed me. And I let him do it in public because I just wanted him to forget what I had said. Even though he was kissing me in a way that would have made my insides turn to mush but I was too busy thinking about what I said. I never really said anything like that without meaning it. Did I love him? We had only been together for about 2 months but we have been friends for more than 6 years.

"I think it is time for all of you to go to bed now and stop making out!" I heard McGonagall's voice boom out over the music and then I pulled away from Sirius and I knew I was blushing. I hated getting caught doing something by the teachers because they always told her dad. She hated doing anything that made her dad look at her like she had disappointed her.

"Goodnight baby." I said giving him one last peck while the Professor wasn't looking. He nodded and we went to our dorms.


	2. Chapter 2

"Ouch! Ash, stop moving!" Adam said when I climbed into his bed. I used to climb into his bed all the time when we were little kids. But I rarely climbed into his bed anymore until now. There was thunder storm going on outside and I was scared because my dad wasn't home. I always was a Daddy's girl.

"Addy!" I said getting closer to him as a really loud thunder sounded.

"You have got to be kidding me? Ash, we haven't been home for more than a few hours and you are already in my bed…and stop calling me Addy, Ashy!" Adam said.

"I'm only in here because it's scary out there. Why did they make us move into separate rooms anyway? Its scary being without you here." I said turning on the light and sitting up in his bed. He took the cue and sat up too rubbing his sleepy eyes.

"You just have to be brave, you are a Gryffindor after all." He said pushing that into my face. I rolled my eyes and closed them when I heard the thunder again. Adam sighed and put a silencing spell on the room. Why didn't I think of that? That way I wouldn't have been scared.

"Something else is bothering you." Adam said reading my feelings. He was right something else was bothering me. I was mad at myself for saying those words to Sirius.

"Yeah, before we left I accidentally said I love you to Sirius." I admitted. Adam's eyes got big before he tried to stifle a laugh. I swatted his arm to shut him up.

"I can't believe you said that. What did HE say?" Adam asked.

"Nothing, I corrected myself before he could say something." I said telling him what I had said to clear things up between Sirius and I.

"Do you think he bought it?" Adam asked. I shrugged hoping with all my heart that he did buy it. The last thing I needed was him breaking up with me because I frightened him off.

"Don't worry things cant get too bad." Adam said. I rolled my eyes and pulled his covers up to my neck.

"Ash, go to your bed." He whined. I shook my head and I put my back to him. I was glad that his bed was a double. It was big enough for the two of us to sleep in. His room was just like you would expect a young mans room to look like. He had a black cover for his bed and Quidditch posters all over his walls. He had a dresser and a closet full of clothes. School robes, muggle clothes and regular robes. My room was completely different, I didn't have any dark colors in my room. My comforter was white and orange and my walls were covered with a mirage of pictures of my family, my friends and Sirius and I in a couple of the pictures. I had a bunch of clothes all around, my favorites were muggle clothes, especially in the summer because I hated the heavy robes that the witches always wore. I liked the shorts and tank tops and jeans.

"You have your own bed." I heard Adam mutter before I fell to sleep. I started to dream about Sirius and I walking hand in hand along the beach. Adam shifted in the bed and I woke up. The sun was shining and I regretted opening my eyes immediately. I groaned and got up knowing that it would be difficult for me to fall back asleep. I never could fall back asleep once I opened my eyes to the sunshine.

"Good Morning, oh twin of mine!" I said yawning. He grunted and turned his back to me. I got up and went into the kitchen knowing that my mother would be nowhere in sight. I opened the fridge to see if she remembered to actually buy some food for our arrival.

"There won't be anything in there." I heard Adam say. I turned and closed the door and I saw him waving an envelope that had some money sticking out. I sighed, of course because it would be too much hassle to actually go grocery shopping so your kids could eat.

"Oh god, of course. So do you want to go shopping or shall I? How about we do it together?" I said walking out of the kitchen to my room. I didn't really want to go alone. I pulled on a pair of faded jeans and a tank top and pulled my hair up into a ponytail. Adam was already ready waiting for me outside my bathroom. We shared a bathroom that was in between both of our rooms.

"Ready?" He asked and we started to walk to the nearest store. It was sunny out and I could smell the freshly watered grass and I could see kids playing on the streets while their parents were gardening or looking out the kitchen window.

"What do you feel like eating?" I asked him imagining myself eating some eggs and bacon with a side of toast and orange juice.

"Eggs, bacon and toast. I could eat a cow i'm so hungry." Adam said and they entered the store. Immediately I started to throw things into the basket but I didn't notice that Adam was taking things out of the basket.

"You have a huge appetite." Adam said.

"And a perfect figure!" I added posing for him in the middle of the isle. He laughed and I threw a box of kid cereal into the basket.

"She shoots! She scores!" I said clapping. Adam laughed at me and turned his back to decide on some bread. I had learned all about muggle sports in both England and America. I had a wonderful Pen pal in America who kept me up with everything over there. I loved my pen pal; we have been exchanging letters for the last six years. His name was Jonathan and he lived in California. He was a wizard and he has always wanted to come England. I told him he was always welcome to stay at my house if he ever came during the summer and he extended the same offer if I was ever near him.

"You talk way too much to that pen pal of yours." Adam said and we turned down a different isle. We finally finished shopping and we realized that we had to carry all this home with us because we didn't have alternate transportation.

"We could apparate." I whispered to him. He shook his head no and I sighed picking up at least 4 bags, each one of them heavy. We started to walk home, it was only three blocks but we had to walk carrying heavy bags nonetheless. Half way home Sirius caught up with us.

"Hey what are you doing here?" I asked him. I was so excited to see him. He was wearing muggle shorts and a t-shirt that made me just want to jump him. He gave me one of his million dollar grins and my heart melted.

"I came to find you. I thought maybe we could hang out. James and his parents live down there and I saw you guys… here let me help you." He said taking all my bags. I smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Its my knight in shining armor." I joked and he laughed. I caught Adam rolling his eyes and I gave him a look to shut him up before he started. I watched him walk along beside me. Adam was on my other side and we didn't say a word. I was trying not to stare at him but I loved the way he looked. How could I be so lucky to be with such an awesome guy like Sirius Black? Sure he was the ladies man in the school and considered the playboy of the school.

"Want to come in?" I asked him once we reached my house. He looked at the groceries and nodded. He was obviously hungry and we had plenty of food to go around. I helped Adam unload the groceries and then Adam started to make some eggs and bacon.

"I'm guessing that you're hungry?" I asked Sirius and he nodded sniffing the air with his nose.

"Don't worry guys, I've got it. I'll call you when it's ready." Adam said and I pulled Sirius toward my bedroom.

"Ooo, the bedroom already huh?" Sirius said in a low sexy voice that made me giggle. I pulled him closer to my bed and we sat down on the messy bed that I had forgotten to make before I left the house.

"Sorry that it's messy." I said trying to get the covers to completely cover the sheets under it.

"No worries. We would end up getting it messy anyway." He said smiling. I laughed at him and got up so he didn't get the wrong idea. I would have loved to do more with him but I was scared to do anything more with him. I didn't want to be one of those girls who did whatever with him and then got dumped in a short while. I wanted to have a long-term relationship with him.

"So you're living at the Potters?" I asked him. He nodded and looked everywhere but in my eyes.

"Yeah I have been living there for the last two summers." He said. I knew that he had hated his family but I didn't think it was so bad that he didn't live with them. I made my heart reach out for him and his broken heart. I bet that this guy had never experienced unconditional love in his life.

"What your family?" I asked knowing that I was treading on soft turf. He didn't answer for a while and I wasn't going to drop it because I wanted to know more about him and his past.

"I, uh… we don't…. we just, we don't get along." He said as if that had cleared up everything. I nodded even though I wanted to know more about him. I was about to ask another question when he pulled me into his arms and started to kiss me lightly on the lips and then he deepened the kiss. I took in his individual smell and at that moment I wanted nothing more than to smell that for the rest of my life. When I thought that I felt sick to my stomach because I was falling long and hard for this guy and I barely knew anything about him. Sure I knew a little but it wasn't enough for me to fall in love with him. Maybe I was just falling into lust. But I knew that it wasn't lust because every time I thought about him I would get a huge smile on my face.

"Come and eat!" Adam called out from the hallway. I pulled away from Sirius and smiled at him.

"Race you." I said and we took off both heading for the kitchen. I was almost the winner until Sirius pulled me back into him and up over his head. He was carrying me to the kitchen.

"Ahhh! Put me down!" I squealed and when he did he was declared the winner.

"Only because you cheated. You cheater." I said sticking my tongue out at him and taking a bite of the eggs that Adam had made.

"You're just mad you lost." Sirius said with a mouthful of eggs himself.

"No i'm mad because you cheated." I said and that was how breakfast went. Him denying everything and I calling him a cheater. After breakfast Adam agreed to do the dishes while Sirius and I went into my room to hang out and make out. That's what Sirius called it once we got in there. I just playfully swatted him and we wrestled on the ground. I eventually lost and he had me pinned under him. He won a few kisses from me and then Adam said it was time for Sirius to go because our mom might come home and throw a fit. Just as he said that she did walk into the house and saw Sirius leaving.

"Hello." She said looking from Sirius to me.

"Good evening Mrs. Andretta." He said. She smiled and looked at me and then went to her room. She never really talked to Adam and me unless she was yelling at us to do chores and telling us to get out of her face because she couldn't deal with us and work all at once. Most of the time we stayed out of her way and with her work taking her all over England we were grateful that she wasn't around a lot. I said goodnight to Sirius and made him promise to come by tomorrow with James this time and we would all hang out. He kissed me good night and I joined Adam in his room. He had a bag of grapes on his bed and he was reading a book. I jumped on his bed and grabbed a few grapes.

"Catch." I said laughing throwing a grape into his mouth. We used to entertain ourselves like this all the time when we had nothing better to do. He caught it in his mouth and we both sat cross-legged on his bed throwing grapes at each other. We were making a lot of noise laughing at each other and having a good time forgetting that our mom was in the other room and probably fuming about now. The door banged open and she walked in looking furious.

"Would you PLEASE keep it down! I am trying to work on some paper work and I cant concentrate with all this noise. Where is your goddamn father?" She asked finally realizing that he was nowhere in the house.

"He had some work to do with Dumbledore, about next year." I said covering for him because I knew that she would explode if she thought he wasn't doing anything work related. She was one of those insecure women who had to constantly keep track of my dad. She would freak out if she knew that he was going somewhere without us or her and it had nothing to do with work. I always wondered why such an amazing guy like my dad would be with her when she wasn't so amazing. Sure she was ok when we were little but now she was unbearable. I hated being around her and I hated that she knew it.

"Sorry, we wont make any more noise." Adam said looking down at his bed. I suddenly got mad at him for not sticking up to her but that subsided when I realized that I wouldn't confront her either. She slammed the door shut and I closed my eyes trying to think how long it will be until dad came home. He would stick up for us no matter what.

"When did he say he would be home again?" I asked Adam hoping that I had forgotten and he would actually show up tomorrow morning with gifts and promises never to leave us this summer again.

"Sometime next week. Who knows when it will be." Adam said sulking. I threw another grape at him and he caught it. Then we both burst out laughing but then shut up real fast for fear of waking up the monster again.

"That's what she is… a monster." I said after we had stopped holding in our laugh. Adam nodded.

"Was she always like this?" Adam asked and I knew he was trying to find a memory of her without her being so horrible.

"She was probably nice before we were born. I think she just hates us. Do you ever think that maybe dad forced her into having us and then keeping us?" I asked Adam, I had always wondered why she had even had us if she didn't want us because it had always seemed as if she didn't want us.

"Maybe he used his charm to persuade her to keep us but they had us out of love." Adam said.

"Love? Do you really think they love each other? I mean they sleep separately most of the time." I said. Adam nodded sadly and I slipped under the cover of his bed getting ready to sleep before he pushed me to the ground.

"Ouch!" I yelled when I hit the floor.

"Sleep in your own bed." He said taking up the entire bed by stretching his legs and arms. I got up and gave him the evil before leaving his room. My room was much better anyway because on my bed you could still smell Sirius' scent. It was faint but I could still smell it and it lulled me to sleep just thinking about him and his wonderful yet pained eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

"Wake up!" I heard Adam say and then I felt a wave of freezing water hit my head. I screamed and ran after him by following him into the living room. I stopped all of a sudden when I saw Sirius and James sitting on the couch.

"Ah! Adam!" I yelled immediately covering my stomach with my hands. I was wearing a shirt that I had had since I hit puberty and it didn't fully cover my stomach and I was wearing short shorts that I usually wore in the summer. Sirius raised his eyebrows and I heard James whistle. Sirius covered James' eyes with his hand and I ran to my room to put something else on. I put on some jeans and a t-shirt then I pulled my hair up into a ponytail because it was so hot and splashed some lipstick on my lips. Hoping that Sirius would forget about the mess he saw earlier.

"There she is, and she's wearing clothes this time." Adam said joking. He was sitting across from James and they were playing Wizards' Chess.

"Shut up!" I said sitting in the open seat beside Sirius. He wrapped his arms around my shoulder and leaned in real close.

"I liked what I saw." He whispered with a grin on his face. I turned to him with a big surprised grin on my face and I swatted his chest playfully. That's when the mail came and rushed to get it because I was expecting a letter from Jonathan. And sure enough I got the letter. I could recognize his small slanted hand writing anywhere. But it wasn't just a letter it was a package.

"Who is that from?" Sirius asked trying to pry the package from my hand.

"A package from my pen pal." I said opening it. Inside were a bunch of pieces of American Candy and some maple syrup. He knew that I loved Maple syrup but they didn't sell it anywhere in England. I handed some candy to all of them.

"So your boyfriend sent you a bunch of candy?" Adam joked. He had always called Jonathan my boyfriend because it wasn't usual for a girl and guy to have a long distance friendship for so long but I disagreed. We were only friends, he had a girlfriend and I now had a boyfriend.

"Boyfriend?" Sirius asked. I only laughed at his facial expression. He looked possessive.

"He's joking. Jon is just a friend of mine from America. He sent these candies called Abba Zabba. I love them." I said taking another bite. They were very addictive. Sirius had his open and he was just staring at me so I leaned over and took a bite off his.

"Hey!" He said pulling it back and then tickling me. I started to laugh so hard that I almost dropped the taffy out of my mouth but I caught it and nearly choked.

"Are you ok?" Sirius asked laughing. I nodded and started to chew my taffy. It was really tough and super sweet.

"So what did lover boy say?" Adam asked me once I read the letter.

"He said that he was happy to hear from me as always and he might be coming to England with his family for vacation. He'll give me more details later…. I hope he comes, that would be awesome. We could take him to Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade and the Quidditch World Cup is playing in England this year. We can take him there." I said getting excited about all the things I could show him.

"Do I need to be worrying about you guys?" Sirius asked looking at me.

"No, not at all. I'm fine with my Goofy boyfriend." I said kissing his nose.

"Goofy? Goofy? I'll show you goofy!" He said starting to tickle me again.

"Stop! Stop!" I squealed trying not to pee my pants from laughing so hard. He finally stopped and kissed me on the lips and despite having Adam and James there I kissed him back.

"Knock it off Padfoot!" I heard James cry out. Sirius stopped and seemed to turn almost rigid. As if he was caught doing something he shouldn't be doing. I went to grab his hand but he moved his hand and reached for another piece of candy. I looked between him and James and neither one were looking at me.

"How about we go into my room?" I asked Sirius. He looked happy at the thought until he caught James' eye and then he shook his head.

"I'm next." He said pointing to the game. Would he really choose Chess over making out with me? I mean I know that the game was addicting but I should hope that I was more fun then it.

"I could think of more things that could be more exciting than Chess." I said winking at him. He laughed and shook his head.

"Fine!" I said pretending I was mad at him. I got up and went into the kitchen. I was so hungry but I didn't know what to make. I didn't have time to make a decision because Sirius came in and stood leaning against the counter across from me.

"Ash, where do you think we are going with this?" He asked me.

"What do you mean?" I asked truly confused.

"Us. I mean I don't know… Ash I like you a lot but…" He started and it dawned on me that this was not going to go well. I blinked my eyes because they were hurting from the dryness.

"I see." I said in a low voice. I couldn't allow myself to cry, I knew this was going to come but I just didn't want it to. I really liked him and I was possibly falling in love with him even though that sounded completely bizarre because we have only been going out for 2 months.

"Ash…" He said coming closer to me. He put his hands in mine but I jerked them away trying not to make this any harder than normal.

"Ash, its not you… its me. You're too good for me. I don't deserve you, I'm sorry." He said. I closed my eyes and looked away from him, noticing that I had been holding my breath silently praying that he would say he loved me rather than breaking up.

"Don't say that." I said in a hollow voice.

"I'm sorry…" He whispered. I shook my head and laughed.

"Yeah… whatever." I said grabbing a bottle of water and leaving him there standing alone. I went straight to my room without looking back. I had to stay strong. I magically locked my door so no one could come in. then I threw the bottle of water at the wall and it shattered and water exploded all over my dresser and my make up but I didn't care. I collapsed on my bed and started to bawl. Even though I knew this was going to happen I couldn't prevent it or prepare myself for it. I felt as if my whole world was crumbling around me. Like it was getting hard to breath. I heard a knock on my door but I didn't respond to it. I didn't even want to respond to anything in the world. I wanted to get out of here and try to go somewhere new. Somewhere to get my mind off of things.

A few days later my door swung open yet again. Ever since Adam found out what had happened he had been giving me food in bed but I haven't really been eating a lot. I just haven't felt like doing a lot of things.

"Get out of bed… I'm tired of telling you to move on." Adam said coming and sitting on the bed next to my head. He pulled the blankets back and I tried to pull them back above my head but Adam wouldn't let me. I sighed and closed my eyes, I felt like a pile of goop.

"Dad's going to be home soon and he wants us ready to go out with him. GET UP!" Adam said pushing my off the bed. I got up and went to the bathroom hoping that hanging out with my dad would make me feel a little better. Sure, I felt empty and my heart was aching because I missed him. I missed the assurance of him being there for me and his kiss and his eyes. I missed having him there and hearing his laugh. I pushed him out of my mind trying to take a shower. It felt good having the water cascade down my body and it was cool to the touch too.

When I got out of the shower with a towel wrapped around me Adam was laying some clothes out for me on my bed. I rolled my eyes.

"Thanks… MOM," I said joking. It had actually been the first time I had smiled since Sirius and I broke up. Wow, it was weird to say that. I had to push Sirius out my mind. Adam smirked and left me to get dressed. Adam was too good of a brother to be me. I didn't really deserve him, he always gave and it seemed like I was always taking. Did I ever give him anything? Have I ever thought about him rather than myself at times? I didn't have time to give an answer because I heard the front door open and I was excited to see my dad. I ran from the room and right into his outstretched arms. He laughed and Adam came up behind us giving dad a manly hug in between the many hugs I was giving him.

"Daddy, we have missed you SO much. Don't ever leave us here alone with her again." I said. He rolled his eyes and told us to come with him. We were going to Diagon Alley for an ice cream.

"I've missed you too munchkin." He said giving me another hug.

"Dad! Don't call me that!" I said looking around us in the ice cream shop. Some people looked over but I didn't know them so it wasn't such a big deal.

"You will always be my little munchkin." He said kissing my forehead. I rolled my eyes and Adam was trying not to laugh into his ice cream.

"And you will always be my little monster." He said ruffling up Adam's hair. I stuck my tongue out at him and he just glared at me.

"DAD!" I whispered to make our dad stop. He chuckled and told us that he would be right back. He had to pick something up at one of the shops.

"I'm glad he's home." I said to Adam taking another bite of my Banana Jamma Surprise. It had gummy bears in it and I loved having my gummy bears frozen.

"I'm glad you aren't a depressed slob anymore." Adam said looking at me over his chocolate ice cream.

"Yeah I kind of went into depressed mode huh? I can't help it, I really liked him… A LOT." I said sighing. Adam reached across the table and grabbed my hand.

"Ash, its not the end of the world. I know you liked him a lot but he's not worth it… can you honestly say that you can see yourself with him in the long run… I mean look at the guy he is messed up." Adam said. I gave him a 'don't go there' look and pulled my hand away.

"He's not messed up." I said glumly.

"He hasn't had a relationship that has lasted more than 2 months in his entire life." Adam countered.

"And I was his longest relationship. You just didn't know him like I did. We connected and I… I just can't explain. I just really really like him." I said taking another bite. Comfort food they called it. After something horrible happens you usually eat comfort food, which is any type of junk food. My favorite comfort food was ice cream and candy. It made me feel like there some something to look forward to. Something that could take my mind off of the horrible thing.

"I'm back! And I have surprises for both of you…" My dad said surprising me out of my thoughts. I looked up at him and saw that he was holding a gray and silver owl and a box that had a door on the side with holes in it.

"This is for you. I know you have always wanted your own owl so here you go." My dad said handing the owl over to Adam. His eyes were wide open and his mouth was opened in surprise.

"And for my little girl, I thought I would get you something a little more cuddly. Something you can hang out with if me or you brother weren't around." He said handing the box to me. I looked up at him with a suspicious look on my face. I opened the box and out came a long animal that was furry and looked adorable.

"It's a ferret." He said handing me a bag of supplies to go with it.

"A ferret? What does it do?" I asked picking up the body and holding it against me.

"Well, its there for comfort… Adam told me what happened and I thought maybe this would cheer you up. Put a smile on that beautiful face of yours." He said. I held the ferret to my nose and he liked it. I giggled and hugged it loving it immediately.

"Thank you so much dad!" I said giving him a hug. I was trying to think of a name for my new baby but I was drawing a blank. I wanted it to mean something but at the same time I wanted it to be a unique name. And then I thought of it as it was licking my arm making me laugh because it tickled.

"I'll name it Tickle." I said and Adam laughed rolling his eyes while dad was just smiling at us as if it was going to be the last time he would ever see us. I could see in his eye that something was wrong. Like he was almost sad watching us laugh and having a good time.

"What's wrong dad?" I asked him. The look on his face disappeared and he gave a genuine smile that assured me that nothing was wrong.

"Nothing sweetheart. I'm so glad that I have you guys." He said giving me a kiss on the forehead.


	4. Chapter 4

The next two weeks we were all inseparable. We went everywhere together going out to eat, shop, and just spending time together. I always loved vacation because I didn't have to be formal with my dad around the house. That was one of the horrible things about having your dad working at the same school you go to. You always had to be formal around the other students. We had two relationships, father and daughter and teacher and student. I preferred the father and daughter relationship.

"So dad, we kind of had an idea for our family vacation this summer." I said bringing up the idea I had had at the end of school about the muggle amusement parks in America.

"Yeah what's that?" He asked looking over his paper at me. He was reading the daily prophet and eating some toast and jam.

"Well have you ever heard of muggle amusement parks?" I asked him. He nodded. Of course he had, he loved muggle things.

"I thought maybe we could go to one in America!" I said getting excited over it. It only took my family to get my mind off of Sirius. I actually hadn't thought much about him when my dad or Adam surrounded me. Life didn't seem so horrible if I had them around.

"I'm afraid we cant. We have to go back to school in three weeks and I have to do something with Dumbledore in about a week." He said.

"What! DAD! You can't leave us here alone with her again. YOU JUST CANT!" I stood up knocking my orange juice onto the table. My dad flew up trying to get out of the way of the path of orange juice. But he was too slow because when I looked at him the orange juice was all over his robes.

"Ashleigh Corrine!" He yelled using my middle name. He only used my middle name when I really pissed him off.

"Ashleigh, you will stay here and you will behave and when I get back things will go back to normal." He said wiping the orange juice off his robes with some paper towels. I knew I had pushed the limit and I should apologize but something came over me and I just glared at him and went straight to my room slamming the door behind me. I was so mad at him. First he left us with HER for a whole week in the beginning of the summer and now he was going to leave us with her for the last week of vacation! There was a soft knock on my door and my dad came on. I was sitting on my bed with my head hung. I felt him sit next to me.

"Sweetheart, I know you don't want to be around your mom but you have to give her chance. She is a good person and she loves you guys, she just has a lot of things on her mind right now what with the war and everything." He said putting his arm around my shoulders.

"Dad, she doesn't love us. She hates us; I don't even think she thinks about us at all. She's evil." I said finally looking at him. He chuckled and patted my arm.

"She's not evil. And she doesn't hate you. She's just under a lot of pressure." He said. I rolled my eyes thinking 'she must have been under pressure my entire life then.' But I bit my lip so I wouldn't say any more. Adam walked in and sat on my bed also. Soon we were having a huge pillow fight and I was getting the worst of it. After a bunch of blows to the head we all collapsed on my bed in a big pile. We were all entangled and laughing.

"What should we do today?" He asked us when we all stopped laughing.

"I say we go to Paris!" I said being all dramatic.

"Please, I hate that place. I say we stay around the house and we can play that new muggle board game I got." Adam said running into his room. He had just ordered a muggle game board called Monopoly. His last girlfriend, Gabrielle, had introduced the game to him and he fell in love with it. He had just gotten his own copy of the game in the mail the other day. Dad and I looked at each other and rolled our eyes getting up to go play the game with Adam. We had to have been playing this game all day long it seemed, only taking breaks to get something to eat and drink and then returning to the unfinished game. Dad finally won, I was the first one out of money so I just sat around reading a book while they finished their game. After doing his victory dance around the living room and me rubbing the victory in Adam's face we all ate our dinner and spent some time watching muggle T.V. We didn't watch a lot of muggle T.V. but sometimes when we were home and we had nothing else to do we would turn it on.

The rest of the week passed by so fast that I barely had enough time to think about anything but spending time with dad and Adam. Adam and I were sulking because our dad was leaving this morning.

"I'm sorry but I have to go." He said when he saw our sad faces. He sighed and sat in between us on the sofa in the living room.

"I'll be back and we will have a great time before heading back to school. Ok?" He said but we didn't say anything. We loved hanging out with him, not many people loved their parents as much as us but we only had one that we loved and were really attached to. I don't know what I would do if anything happened to him.

"I love you guys so much. I am going to miss you." He said giving me a kiss on the forehead and hugging Adam.

"I have something for you guys." He said opening his bag and reaching in to get something. I was hoping it wasn't another animal because Tickle was already running wild in the house. He turned to Adam and handed him something small and gold.

"My father gave this to me when I was about your age. It's a pocket watch and I want you to have it. Inside is a picture of me, you and grandpa at the lake. Remember that day?" He asked Adam and he nodded I couldn't see the watch that well but I knew I would see it later once Dad left. Then he turned to me.

"Grandma wanted me to give this to you… its been in our family for a long time. It's a locket and it has a picture of me you and Adam in it." He said opening it. On the back of the locket it said 'To Grace, Love, A'.

"Who is Grace?" I asked him.

"Your Great Great Grandmother." He said rubbing the lock with his thumb. I gave him a kiss and a hug before he got up.

"I want you guys to know that I love you and no matter what I will always be there for you. I'll never leave you guys… ever." He said and he had a weird look on his face.

"Dad, what's going on?" I asked him. I was really confused as to what had brought that on.

"Nothing, I just want you to know that you aren't alone and even if I am gone. You guys have each other." He said giving us one more hug and kiss. I suddenly felt like something bad was going to happen but I didn't know what.

"Dad, don't go." I blurted out. He sighed and shook his head.

"I have to. I made a promise to Dumbledore." He said. And then he left us in the house alone. I collapsed on the sofa in a huffy mood.

"Don't worry, he'll be back soon and then it's off to seventh year!" Adam said thrusting his fist into the air. I rolled my eyes at him. He was so excited to be going into our seventh and final year at Hogwarts. He had become steady friends with a girl from Hufflepuff who was actually a rival Quidditch player but that didn't matter to him. She was a sweet caring girl. And thinking of them together and being happy put me in a depressed mood because I wasn't going to be happy going back to school. I would have to see Sirius and his latest slut everyday. What was going through my mind when I agreed to go out with him? I had a crush on him for so long and hanging out with him and the guys was like heaven. I loved hanging out with guys rather than girls because they were so laid back and they meant what they said. There was no hidden meaning in their words.

Sometime in the middle of the night I had a nightmare and I woke up screaming and crying. Adam must have heard me because he ran into my room trying to calm me down.

"What's wrong?" He asked trying to calm me down after I had been sobbing for the last five minutes. He knew what was wrong but he didn't want to repeat it. I could feel his heart beating as fast as mine. He saw what I saw too.

"You know." I said through my tears. He nodded and hugged me and we fell asleep. No more nightmares woke me up in the middle of the night. I woke up sometime in the morning; both Adam and I were sleeping in my bed. My nose felt stuffy and my eyes felt puffy. I moved and Adam woke up. We got up and got ready for the day without mentioning what had happened last night. I knew that if I even thought about the nightmare I would have started to cry again, it was too unbearable for me think about. I was afraid if I thought about it then it would come true and I didn't want that to happen at all. There was a knock at the door while we were eating our breakfast in silence. Adam got up to answer it and I followed because I had nothing better to do.

"Uh, Hi." He said to our Headmaster.

"Hello, may I come in?" He asked. He didn't look too good; he looked older than I had ever seen him before. I had always thought that he was the strongest person besides my dad but right here and now he looked as if part of him had died. We stepped aside and let him come into the house.

"Can I offer you some tea?" I asked him. I admit I was intimidated and my words were getting mixed up. He shook his head no and we sat down across from him.

"Something has happened. I am sorry to be the one to tell you that your father had passed away." He said and then he said something else but I didn't hear. My mind went blank and I felt numb all over. This wasn't happening, this was just another nightmare. I tried to wake myself but I couldn't. Adam just grabbed my hand and we sat there staring at Dumbledore as if he was an illusion. Dumbledore stayed with us all day contacting people from the ministry trying to get a hold of our mom. By nightfall the death of our father was all over the ministry but they still couldn't get a hold of our mom. Adam and I didn't cry or move or even talk. We just sat there both quiet not moving, barely breathing and trying to feel numb. I knew that if I thought about it then I would cry. And if I cried then it would make it all real and I couldn't stand for it to be real.

"Oh my dear god." I heard my mother's overly dramatic voice. There was not even a hint of concern in her voice. She sounded like this was all one big nuisance. Like my father died on purpose just to piss her off and ruin her day. Adam and I got up instinctively and sat in the corner of the room making sure we were invisible to her eye. She talked to Dumbledore for a few seconds and then turned her attention to us. She was going to put on some elaborate show in front of him to show that she was good mother.

"Oh my poor babies!" She said hugging both of us until Dumbledore excused himself and left us alone… with her. We all sat in the living room.

"Well, um, his funeral is on Saturday… and um I guess you guys should get ready for that and get ready for school on Sunday. So maybe you should go to Diagon Alley and get your things for school… um, its going to be a little crazy around here, so maybe you should stay at the Leaky Cauldron until the funeral. I think it would be best." She said. I looked up and I suddenly didn't feel numb anymore. I felt angry, angry towards her.

"Best for who? Us or you?" I asked raising my voice. I knew that I should have toned it down for a bit but I was too mad. How could she just come in here and act like everything is ok and hen ask us to move out.

"Listen young lady, I know that you are hurting right now but you still WILL NOT talk to me like that. I care about you guys and I just think it would be best for you guys if you stayed at the Leaky Cauldron." She said raising her voice.

"You don't care about us, you don't care that we just lost the best dad in the entire world. You never cared. Where were you when we went on family vacations? Where were you at any time in our lives? We don't even know you and you don't know us. So how can you know what is best for us?" I said getting angry. She looked like she was turning red in the face. She was probably so mad right now, I was afraid she would hit me.

"You ungrateful little brat! I took you in when you were a baby and I took care of you guys. HOW DARE YOU!" She roared. I was determined not to show fear to her.

"Took us in? I didn't know that you "Took us in". I thought it was a duty as a mom?" I said. She looked like she was contemplating something.

"A mom? I'm not even your mom." She said and it seemed like my whole world was slipping away.

"What?" Adam asked.

"I'm not your mom, your mom was some whore bag slut who left you with your dad when she died giving birth. I took you guys in when you had no mom and I took care of you. And then that bloody bastard goes up and dies leaving me with you two." She said.

"Its not like he died on purpose. He was murdered." I said feeling hollow remembering what Dumbledore had said to us. Death Eaters from Voldermorts army had attack him all at once killing him. And he would be put on the memorial wall that was built for people who were killed during the war against Voldermort.

"Yeah and I'm glad about that too. I should have done it earlier." She said under her voice. I felt like throwing up.

"WHAT!" I heard Adam roar. I had never heard him get so angry in my life. I sat down all of a sudden because Adam seemed to want to take over.

"I killed him." She said simply with no remorse at all. Then she got up and Adam raised his wand ready to take action but she was too quick. She stunned him and me and we couldn't move at all. Then we saw her leave with a few bags and that was it. An hour later someone knocked on the door and then entered. My heart stopped when I saw whom it was. Sirius, James and Remus came into the living room and when they saw us they started to laugh. They undid the stunning spell and I looked down to my feet feeling angry but equally embarrassed at the same time.

"What happened?" Remus asked me sitting next to me and grabbing my hand. I shook my head I was too angry to talk and I knew that if I opened my mouth then I would start to cry. Everything seemed to real right now and I didn't understand why my life went from perfect to horrible in just one summer.

"Our dad…" Adam started but he could say it. Remus nodded, obviously they all knew about it.

"Our mom… or um, well, I guess she isn't our mom… she told us that she had been the one who killed him. She works for Voldermort." Adam said. Remus put his arm around me and I just stared. I didn't realize what I was staring at until I saw Sirius' look up. Our eyes met and I looked away.


	5. Chapter 5

LovePadfoot5867: yeah this is mostly about Sirius and Ashleigh, Remus is just the really good friend who Sirius gets jealous of lol.

Beauiful Enigma : And thanks, I hope I can update enough to make school just a little easier. Don't worry though cause life isn't all that great once you get out of school. Lol.

Remus stayed with us at the Leaky Cauldron along with James and Sirius. Dumbledore found out what our mom had done and she was now being searched for by all of her co-workers in the ministry. He told us to pack up what was necessary and go to the Leaky Cauldron until we were to leave for Hogwarts. The funeral was tomorrow and I couldn't stand to breath anymore. I had spent the last four days in my room at the Leaky Cauldron reading books and trying to escape reality. I was usually writing poems, stories, and reading books. I went to meet Adam and the guys down stairs for dinner. I had promised Adam that I would eat dinner with them tonight so he would just shut up about it.

"So I bought all your school stuff today." Adam said trying to get rid of the silence between us all. Remus had always been a great friend to me and I was glad that he was trying to be there for Adam and me right now but I just wanted my dad back. I grunted to let him know that I heard him. Tickle ran up my leg and onto my lap. I gave a small smile so I wouldn't cry because every time I looked at him he would remind me of dad. I fed him a piece of my carrot and he ate it happily.

"Come on Ash, you need to eat." Adam said putting his fork down.

"I ate." I said thinking about earlier that day. I had some fruit.

"You have to eat more. Dad would want you to." He said quietly. I looked up at him so fast I hurt my neck.

"Don't talk about what he would want. He's not here, I am and I'll do what I want!" I said pushing back from my chair and grabbing Tickle before leaving to go back to my room. Adam and I shared a room with two beds and the three boys shared a room. There was a soft knock on the door and it reminded me of my dad and I felt a stab in the heart when I thought of him. It felt so weird knowing that someone you were close to is no longer there. It made you feel hollow and all I wanted to do was eat to fill it up but I couldn't because I felt bad just going into the real world to get food. It was like I didn't want to live life if he couldn't.

"Hey." I heard Remus say as he sat beside me. I put my head on his shoulder. He was one of my really good friends and I always felt like I could talk to him about anything but right now I didn't want to talk. I wanted everything to be ok, I wanted life to be ok to live again.

"I didn't mean to yell." I said so quietly that I wasn't sure I even said it. Adam walked in and Remus took the cue to leave. He sat down beside me and gave me a hug. I just cried, I cried because I knew that it was real and I would have to deal with it.

"I know how you are feeling, I feel the same way but I am making myself be strong for you." Adam said and is saw tears slide down his face.

"I feel like it's not right to move on, like life isn't ok live anymore. Why should we enjoy things like good food when he cant?" I said through my tears. He held me tighter and we stayed like that for a while.

"Because we're still alive and you know dad, he always says that we should live life to the fullest even during the dark times." Adam said. And all I could think was that he doesn't always 'say', he always said. Past tense.

"I just don't feel right." I said lying down on my bed and pulling the covers over me. Adam left me alone to go to sleep, but even sleeping was hard to do.

I wore a simple black dress that hung perfectly on me and in any other circumstances I would have been glad to wear a dress like this. I sat in the front of all the rows of seats Adam was sitting next to me and Remus was on my other side. I stared straight ahead determined not to look at the faces giving me and Adam looks of pity. I could hear the ladies behind us talking about us already.

"Oh, those poor children, having to go through life without their father and their mother… running off to join you know who." The lady behind us said in a hushed voice. Adam knew what I was thinking because he squeezed my knee to prevent me from saying anything. People kept on coming up to us expressing their deepest sympathies. But none of them really knew my father, none of them.

"Your father was such a good man, he will be missed." An elderly lady with graying hair said to us. We nodded and stared straight ahead. A few people got up to say a few things, some people we didn't know and a few we did know.

"He was a gentle man who had a certain charm about him that made everyone love him within seconds. He will be missed so much by everyone that he left behind. His wonderful children, his co-workers and his friends." An old man who I did not recognize said. A few more went up and said a few things before they put our father into the ground. Adam and I went up together to place a single flower on his coffin. I placed my hand on the cool wood and a single tear went down my cheek. How could he have left us? And how could he not tell us about our real mother? I had so many questions that I wouldn't be able to ask now.

"Come on, Lets go sit back down." Adam said pulling me away from the coffin. I sat down and I put my head on Remus' shoulder. I closed my eyes and tried to will this all to go away. I just wanted to run far and fast from it all, get out and never have to deal with this. But even as I imagined myself running far away from all this I was still sitting in my same spot and all I wanted was someone to hold me. To surround me with love and be there for me. Sometime while I was imaging myself running far away we left and we were back in the Leaky Cauldron. We were all silently eating at one of the tables near the bar. I was actually eating even though I felt rotten for doing so. I reached across the table and took a push up pop that I had bought a minute earlier. I loved push up pops. I started to eat it and I could tell that Adam was glad that I was eating again. I felt bad that all this responsibility was pushed onto him. Why couldn't I be stronger so he didn't have to look after me all the time. Sirius was actually sitting next to me for a change and I didn't know what to say to him. I wanted so desperately to be in his arms while he told me everything was going to get better. I wanted to feel his heart beat against mine while I cried all my sadness away.

"Hey." He said after Remus, James and Adam got up to go and get some more ice cream from the shop.

"Hi." I said softly looking down at the table and tracing the grains.

"Look, I'm sorry, I know you must be tired of hearing with that but I am, not just for your dad but for hurting you." Sirius said quietly. I looked at him. Even though I was mad that he broke up with me this is what I wanted to hear.

"Don't worry about it, I haven't thought much about us anyway." I said. He looked hurt but he covered it up.

"I understand, I mean you have been dealing with a lot. I miss you… I don't know what came over me when I broke up with you but I miss you." He said. I wouldn't look at him because I thought maybe I would just run into his arms. So I remained quiet because I missed him to. I missed a lot of things, I missed having such a perfect life.

"Um, Excuse me, Ashleigh?" I heard a male voice say and I turned to see who it was. I looked at him trying to remember where I had known him from.

"Yes?"

"Hi, I'm sorry if I interrupted anything but I'm Jon." He said and then it hit me that my pen pal was standing right in front of me. The guy that I had been exchanging letter and packages with for the last seven years. We had always talked about meeting each other but we never got the chance and now he was standing right in front of me. He had dark brown almost black shaggy hair that hung near his face. He had some stubble on his face and his eyes were bright green.

"Jon? As in Jon Jon?" I asked knowing I wasn't making much sense. He laughed and ran his hand through his hair nervously.

"Its actually just Jon. But you can call me Jon Jon if you like." He said. I laughed looking down feeling embarrassed.

"Wow, what are you doing here? Oh my gosh, go ahead and pull up a chair, if you have some time." I said. He nodded and pulled up a chair to sit in front of Sirius and I.

"Um, I'm going to Hogwarts for my last year." He said totally surprising me.

"Really? Are you serious?" I asked. This was incredible but why would he leave his friends and family to come to this boarding school?

"Yeah, I decided to come here because you have always talked so highly of it." He said. I stopped smiling because I was suddenly reminded of my father and that this year he wouldn't be at the school with us. He wouldn't be keeping an eye on us so we didn't step out of line and he wouldn't be there to slip us candy after class. Adam came up to us with another push up pop in his hand for me.

"Hi, who are you?" He asked bluntly, handing me the ice cream and taking Sirius' seat.

"Uh, hi, I'm Jon." He said reaching his hand out to shake Adams'. He looked at me and I nodded to tell him that it was ok. This guy wasn't a bad guy.

"Its Jon, my pen pal." I told Adam and he relaxed a bit and shook his hand.

"Wow, I've heard so much about you. What brings you here?" Adam asked him.

"I was just telling Ash that I am going to spend my seventh year at Hogwarts." He told Adam.

"Yeah, why? I mean why spend your last year at a completely different school?" I asked. He looked down at his hands and I thought that maybe I had said something but when I went over what I had said to him, I didn't think anything was offensive.

"Well, um, my, uh… my best friend died and um, I don't want to go back to being reminded of him, especially at school. Change should be a good thing for me." He said finally looking up at me. And right away I saw pain in his eyes just like I saw pain in Sirius' eyes that night when we talked about his family.

"I know how you feel when you lose someone." I said squeezing his hand to silently let him know that I was there for him. Over the last seven years we have become great friends to each other and I was always there for him during his fights with his parents or his friends and he was always there for me too. He was almost as close as Adam was to me.

"Who did you lose?" He asked me.

"My dad." I said in barely there whisper. It still felt weird to acknowledge that he was gone. Every time I thought about him something inside me hurt so bad I just wanted to cry. It was hard to realize that I would no longer be able to hear him laugh or make fun of me playfully or even tell me off when I stepped out of line.

"So this is your boyfriend huh?" Sirius said behind me coldly. I turned and glared at him for even saying anything.

"He's not a boyfriend, he's a friend… and does it really matter if he was? Its not like i'm attached." I said back as coldly as he did. James, Remus and Adam gave out a low whistle and looked the other way.

"Am I missing something?" Jon asked.

"Absolutely nothing, lets go talk." I said pulling him up the stairs to my room. I didn't want to be alone with him but something told me to do it to make Sirius jealous. I didn't know why I felt the need to make him jealous when he shouldn't even be mattering to me on a day like this.

"Wow, you look great, your pictures don't do you any justice." Jon said once we were in my room. I was making sure I was packed up and ready to go tomorrow morning. I wasn't excited to be going back at all, in fact I dreaded it.


	6. Chapter 6

I pulled out a bag of chocolate and started to eat it while I was watching Adam getting ready for bed the night before we were to go to Hogwarts.

"You keep eating that crap and you will get fat." Adam said sitting on my bed taking out a piece and popping it into his mouth. I smiled.

"If I get fat then you have to get fat." I said. He let out a bark like laugh.

"Who says?"

"It's a twin rule, we always have to look somewhat alike." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Then you can cut your hair." He said challengingly.

"No, you can grow yours longer." I said tugging at my own hair.

"So I bet you were surprised about Jon showing up." Adam said after a while of eating chocolate and making funny faces.

"Definitely. I think Sirius was going to say he made a big mistake about breaking up with me until Jon showed up." I said trying to read his expression.

"You know me… and you know my stand on any relationship with Sirius Black… but I have spent the last few days with him and… he really likes you… from what I can tell Remus and sometimes James have been trying to keep you guys apart." Adam said. And I knew instantly that he wasn't lying because he really did hate Sirius Black and for him to say this about him meant something.

"What do you mean?" I asked him. He looked down at his hands and bit the side of his cheek. He had a habit of doing that.

"I mean that I think Sirius broke up with you because his friends told him to. To protect you of course. I guess they didn't have much faith in their friends ability to not break your heart… if that made any sense then I did a good job but I don't think it did." Adam said laughing nervously.

"I get it, I don't know what I think about it but I get what you mean… I think we should go to bed. I'm tired." I said getting under my covers and turned my back to him thinking about what he had said. If they really got to him and made him break up with me then did that mean that I should get back with him? I closed my eyes going to sleep trying to block out the day and everything that happened in it.

The train ride went well, a bunch of girls gathered around Jon inquiring where he was from, etc. I just sat there with Adam and we exchanged looks, I swear sometimes its like we can read each other's mind. I could sit in front of him and know what he is thinking and I could send him a message and he would know what I was thinking. We were in tune like that. Everything was fine until the feast came up and when I looked up at Dumbledore who was telling us to dig in I saw my father's usual chair occupied by a lady. At least she looked nice enough. She had light brown hair and emerald green eyes that I knew so well. Adam and I had the same eyes as her, it was uncanny. I nudged Adam and he looked to where I was staring and his mouth dropped open. I knew what he was thinking, wow, those eyes. I nodded and we looked away when she caught us looking at her. We ate dinner quietly and then went to our rooms quietly. I didn't think it would hit us this hard once we were at school. Every time we passed someone it seemed as if they were whispering. All I wanted to do was turn around and start screaming at the top of my lungs that 'YEAH ITS TRUE! Now find something else to gossip about You bloody gits!' but I didn't, I stayed silent locking all my emotions within me. Jon ended up being sorted into Ravenclaw and a bunch of girls from Ravenclaw seemed very happy. I slipped into my bed and fell asleep instantly.

The next morning I woke up and got ready for the first day of class. I would have to sit through boring classes while TRYING to stay awake. Maybe I should just bring a book along and try to disappear in the background. I decided that was the best plan and I slipped a muggle book into my bag with my books for DADA and Potions. Two very hard classes on my first day.

"Hey." Adam said once I reached the great hall. I smiled and started to nibble on a piece of toast while reading my book. I didn't want to go to DADA in fact I thought maybe I would just ditch it and go to the Room of Requirement instead.

"DADA first." I said and Adam nodded looking up to see my face. I gave him a sympathetic smile.

"Maybe we should talk to Dumbledore… ask if we can take it by ourselves." Adam suggested.

"We cant do that and you know it. We'll survive class." I said picking up my stuff and we headed toward the class to see what was in store for us. DADA was always my best subject but now I had no interest in learning any of it. I had no interest to be in school it was all just too overwhelming. I took one step into the classroom and I remembered all the times I had stayed after class just to spend time with my dad before his next class and I remembered all the times he picked on me in class making sure I knew all the material and I wished that I could have just one of those moments back. It was getting so hard to remember every detail of him because if I did remember than I would start crying. Adam grabbed my hand and led me to the back of the classroom. I sat and stared off into space commanding myself not to cry.

"Good Morning Class… My name is Ms. Hewitt and I will be your new DADA teacher. Before we begin anything I would like to give a few seconds of appreciation to your former DADA teacher. I knew him once and he was an incredible man, never deserved to die that way." Professor Hewitt said. She sounded as if she was American by the accent. I looked at Adam and he nodded, we both knew that she looked familiar and not just by the eyes. She said she once knew our dad but I cant remember ever meeting her. I pushed her out of my mind and started to read my muggle book behind my textbook so I wouldn't catch any crap from her. After class was over I decided I wanted to spend time down by the lake alone to finish up my book. I knew that I should have paid more attention in class but I couldn't help it. I didn't want to be reminded of my dad so much. I settled down at the edge of the lake and began to read hoping for the peace and quiet to continue.

"Well, well… if it isn't the one who lost it all." A horrible voice said aloud. I knew whom it was with out even looking. It was Bella and Snape of course. I inhaled and looked at them with a smile on my face.

"How does it feel to lose your boyfriend, dad and mum all at once?" She asked me.

"How do you think?" I answered her question with another question. I wasn't going to let her know how I felt.

"I think you are a sneaky little bitch who deserved to lose your daddy. At least now you will really have to work for your grades." Snape spat at me. I pulled out my wand and jumped to my feet ready to fight but I never got the chance because I was thrown backwards into the air by Snape. The last thing I saw before hitting the water was their smug faces. The cold water hit me like a smack in the face and I was half worried about getting hypothermia. I rocketed to the surface and took in a deep breath. My teeth started to chatter and I knew that I needed to be getting out of there fast before the giant squid got to me. I started to swim as fast as I could but I felt a tentacle on my leg and I was pulled under the surface with my lungs full of air. I couldn't talk under water so I thought about the spell I wanted but it wasn't working, I was panicking. I tried to swim for the surface but I couldn't escape the grasp of the squid. I was being pulled farther and farther under and the light on the surface was becoming smaller and smaller. Darkness was enclosing all around me and ended up sucking up water instead of air and then all I saw was darkness. I didn't know if I was dead or not. Then I was yanked back up but I was only half aware of it.

Sirius' POV

I was walking out to see Ashleigh by the lake when I saw Bella and Snape ganging up on her. The next thing I know Ashleigh is being thrown into the lake. I ran straight for her determined to help her. I was almost there when I saw her being pulled under. I swam toward her but I never saw her come up and I started to panic. I couldn't bear it if anything happened to her. No matter what everyone thinks I really did care about her a lot. She was just so innocent and lovable and she had a certain charm about her that made me love every bit of her. I dived under and I saw her hand slipping further and further into the darkness. I swam as fast as I could to get a hold of her. I stunned the squid and grabbed her hand pulling us both to the top. When I got her on land she wasn't breathing. I remembered from muggle studies how to do CPR when someone wasn't breathing. I tilted her head back and breathed air into her lungs. And then I proceeded to do CPR until she spit up water and then started to cough. I sighed with relief and held her tight against me.

"Oh my God, I thought I had lost you." He whispered in her ear. He knew he was smothering her but he loved her and he couldn't bare life without her. She gave a weak smile then she passed out. I picked her up and ran all the way to the Hospital Wing.

"What happened?" The nurse asked when I set Ashleigh on the bed.

"She was drowning in the lake." I said and immediately the nurse started to check everything out. I backed away and then Adam burst in.

"I knew something was wrong." He said breathlessly. I told him what had happened and he rushed to Ashleigh's side. The nurse was busy undressing Ashleigh and I left right away because I knew I shouldn't be seeing that. I came back in a few minutes later when I saw the nurse walking away with Ashleigh's tattered robes. She had been badly burned by the squid's tentacles.

"What did the nurse say?" Sirius asked Adam.

"She'll be fine. She's badly burned but a day or two in here will get her up in no time… God, Sirius, I felt her die. All the air in my lungs disappeared and I couldn't breath I know exactly how she felt under there but I couldn't get there fast enough. I don't know what I would have done if she had died. I don't think I would have coped at all. Its hard enough coping with my dad but my twin sister? I'd kill myself." Adam said still holding on tight to Ashleigh's hand.

"Don't talk like that man. It doesn't matter anyway now, she's alive and she is going to get better. We'll just keep an eye on her." Sirius said trying to comfort Adam. Adam nodded and Ashleigh opened her eyes. She was the most beautiful girl in the world. I had liked her ever since I first met her. She wasn't like any girl I had ever gone out with. She didn't hang out with girls, mostly just the guys and she was ordinary looking. Well, besides her eyes, they were amazing. I don't know why I never went out with her to begin with and let it evolve from there but I didn't. I think it was because I was afraid that I might hurt her or something and I couldn't bear to do that. But now I knew that I wouldn't hurt her because she is the one that I wanted but stupid Remus and James made me break up with her before anything went any further. I had been putting it off for a month and a half before I broke up with her.

"Hey you." Sirius said grabbing her other hand. She smiled at him and took a deep breath.

"Well if it isn't my knight in shining armor." She said laughing and then wincing. It must hurt her to laugh. I gave out a nervous laugh and held onto her hand enjoying the warmness and the touch of our skin.

"Yeah, you are so lucky he was there. You would have died." Adam said. She let go of my hand and put it on top of Adam's other one.

"I wouldn't have died…. But I am grateful that you saved me, thank you." She said grabbing my hand once again and pulling me closer to her. She kissed my cheek and I felt the bottom of my stomach do a few flips. She had such a weird effect on me.

"OK, out out out. She needs her rest come back tomorrow." The nurse said,

"I'm not leaving her. We'll let her rest but I am not going to leave her." Adam said staring the nurse in the eye.

"I'm not leaving either." I said. The nurse sighed and walked away. Ashleigh grinned up at us.

"I love you guys." She said and the nurse came back out and made Ashleigh drink some type of potion and she was out like a light. I sat down in a seat next to Adam and thought about what Ashleigh had said. Did she really mean it when she said that she loved us? Or did she mean it more towards Adam? I remember when she had said 'I love you' at the end of sixth year to me but then she covered it up. I don't know, I thought, and I sighed settling in for a long time.


End file.
